Lisa Sanders: Persistence of Doubt, Particles of Light

“This series of recent paintings represent some of my dominant memories about parenting and how with the onset of love comes an equally powerful presence of uncertainty, worry and guilt.

These memories are malleable stories that we tell ourselves. They morph and change over time. We attach different emotions to them, and they take root in our psyche.

After selecting photographs that were charged with specific stories about me as a parent, I slowly and carefully drew each photograph while paying careful attention to how light presented itself in each scene. I eventually allowed this light to drive the imagery within each painting. By removing the content of the scene and through preserving the illumination, I discovered that these light filled spaces were deep, undefined and enticing. They presented an opening for re-engaging and then re-telling difficult narratives.

Throughout this process, deeply personal emotions attached to each memory, were recalled, redefined and then repurposed. Eventually feelings of doubt and regret dissipated and were replaced by tenderness and a renewed peace of mind.”

-Lisa Sanders